Romans 9: 25 - 26 " As He says also in Hosea, “I will call those who were not My people, ‘My people,’ And her who was not beloved, ‘beloved.’ “And it shall be that in the place where it was said to them, ‘you are not My people,’ There they shall be called sons of the living God.”
Observations/Application:
This Chapter was a difficult read, to understand the focal point of the message but also because it addressed lot of concerns and feelings I struggle daily. It is not easy to know in your head that the only way is have faith in God, relentlessly give to him and reach for him as he wait for us to patiently. Though I know this in my head it is such a struggle to perform in my heart. I struggle to lead with my heart, but I tend to lead with my head. I know it and I want to fix it but I can't seem to. Maybe that is why I struggle with guilt issue, daily I fear that I cry in my heart that I am a sinner and the guilt overwhelms my emotions. As if I don't deserve any of the grace and mercy God pours onto me. His sacrifice to save me and wash my sins, but I seem to continue on with same sins over and over. When bad things happen to me and my family, I wonder if God has reached his point with me and have given up on me? I think I have control issues, maybe I enjoy to endure of pain, but who would enjoy such? When I do go through tough times, I question the will of God? Also, I question if God does really love me regardless, love me for who I am, and has forgiven me of my sins? Am I really his daughter and princess of his Kingdom? I often struggle with that theology and application? I seem to fail all his test and obstacles he places in front of me over and over. I am a bit complacent where I am, because good things doesn't happen to often. I am not thinking properly, my perspective need to change. Instead of trying to measure the goods and everything in my life, I need to reflect to this passage which came a a great time of life, when in my head and heart I know I need to refocus and stir to God's word. When my insecurities are taken advantage by Satan and place this doubtful questions in my head this chapter in Romans was a reminder that just because I am not from Israel (physically) or Jew that doesn't mean I am not God's child. Just because I screw up doesn't mean God doesn't love me or abandon me. God is my ultimate father who knows and shields from all insecurities. God knows and understands my fears, this is reminder that whatever the insecurities I have I need to be reminded that God has specifically selected me and designed me for his purpose. And in this chapter it is reminded that God chose to call me "my people" and "beloved" though there are many criticism and doubts I may endure, he will fight the battle with Satan and call me to be his "son of the living God".
